i try

The last two weeks that had passed was pretty hectic but in a happy and fun way.  We spent a lot of our week-ends while Mr. Hubby was here doing some fun things at the beach, either it was body surfing, or just catching the waves and got dump at the beach with full sand under our bathers, crabbing, walking and beach hopping.  We did participated in Cleaning Up Australia, though not so many rubbish to collect ( is it a good sign?) around our river.  The kids were happy, the dog was happy too, everybody was in the good mood.

Then the mood changed.  Mr. Hubby had to go back to work and this time for two weeks full.  So, it's going to be just me and the kids....oh and the dog and chooks.  T1 kept asking if Hubby could stay for his swimming carnival on Monday, which was he knew the answer pretty sure, but good on trying kiddo.

It doesn't get any easier.  I told myself I was going to be different this year.  That I can handle and cope well.  I got better at saying good-bye and he always messaged when he landed.  I try not to get bitter when he rang and told me he's had a nice dinner with the team work while I was in the middle between cooking dinner and helping the kids with their homework.

Some days are ok, but some days I feel suffocate with homework, being a mum's taxi, and doing house chores, and nobody to talk to or to share with at the end of the day.  Yesterday, I was helping T2 to do his English homework.  It was raining and thunderstorm outside, while I was struggling to teach him to count how many syllables in a word 'laughter' , my mental and crazy dog was howling and scratching like a mad woman at the door wanted to get inside.  Of course I couldn't let him in, because first I was in the middle of frustration with T2, second that dog was soaking wet and covered in a mud!  So, I sent T1 who had finished his homework to tell that dog to get his own chill pill!  Anyhow, we finally let him in through the laundry door straight to the garage where he was happily stayed there til we forget him! That was a story of my life.

When T1 got second place at the swimming carnival and received his medal, he whispered to me, I wish Dad could have watched me.  Yes sweetheart, I wish the same too.

Meanwhile it's just us now.

It never gets any easier.

Here's a bit of Macy.  Yes, I try.