Mr. Hubby is traveling a lot these days. He's been commuting interstate and only home on the week-ends. I miss him. The Boys miss him. The dog misses him. We miss him.
It's not the empty side in the bed or the empty chair at the dining table, but the realization at the end of the day that he's not going to walk through the door with his usual, "Daddy's home" .
I always nervous every time Mr. Hubby has to go away. I have this acute paranoia that I can't sleep the whole night until early morning. I will hear every noises and my imagination will go wild. I know it's pathetic but I can't help. I just have to live with it. Usually on the forth days I will crash and sleep through the night. And the next day the cycle will begin again.
Being a single parent when he's away it's not easy for me. Boys after school activities is one thing, I have to drop one boy here then get to drive to another place for the other one. Then the homework that I sometimes feel like it's my homework rather than the kid's! Not to mention the argument I have to sort out about who is going to have shower first or the dog has been fed yet, forms from school that need to be signed, sport carnival to attend, and all the different dramas that can happen in my household.
When he's away I sometimes think about all the single parent out there and how lonely those nights can be when you don't have someone to bounce ideas off of or to make decision or to share the worries that had been in the back of your mind. I also admire their strength, being a solo parent is tough. I've got it easy compare to these women.
He often asks me, "so you don't think you can cope when I'm away?" and my answer is always the same, "well, I suppose I can, I have to, I have no choice". I am okay but I don't like being a solo parent. I need Mr. Hubby, I couldn't imagine doing this all without him.